It is my great pleasure to introduce to you Little Franklin AKA Mr. Derpurrez as my very first guest here on “Katdid Konversations’. I am your host, Kitty Mojito.
Franklin is a 3 year old mini panther from Brooklyn, New York. He holds a very important position in the Cats of Instagram community. He is a leader, activist, great party planner and was recently awarded the ‘Cat of the Year’ award for all his wonderful contributions to the COI community.
LF: Mi moms spotted mee on a pet add option web sight & instant Lee fell in luv with mi cute face & de weigh Eye wuz posin fur de cam rah. Eyed bin res queued frum a shell tour, wear Eye wuz put aft err mi furst home, a hord errs, wuz raided, & Eye wuz B yin fostered. Wen mi moms cames ovah to meat mee fur de furst thyme, Eye walk rite ovah to her & sit on her hand. Eye new rite ah weigh dat shee wuz mi moms, ewe sea. Eye did ant no Annie thang ah bout daddys yet, butt den dis man scoop mee up in his arms & toll mee all ah bout it, & Eye likes wut Eye herd.
LF: Dares mi Instagram life, wear Eye TCB inn Derpurrez mode, court mi shaw tea, travel thru derp spays, & go to wiled pawties; den dares mi Instagram life wear Eye show wut Eye yam up to at home; & dares mi home life dat B purrivate. At home Eye sleep, eat, poop, play, snug gull, soup purr vise, travel thru derp spays, derp, bathe mi self, dew meowga, meowditate, & Jen err alley make every thin bet err. Wut all mi purrsonas have in com in B derp spays, witch ain’t sum plays weigh out dare…it B on de inside, ewe dig?
KM: What kind of food do you like, Franklin?
LF: Eye yam a Paul tree man (Turk key, duck, chick kin: nom, nom, & nom!), butt ewe nose wut day say ah bout tune ah: it de chick kin of de see.
KM: Do you have a favourite toy?
LF: Mi stuff mouseys Goldie & Violet, & all sew mi stuff dino sore Dinah dat mi kat bro Jude gave to mee a phew months ah go.
KM: Franklin, I have known you for awhile now and you have a unique and wonderful personality. How would you describe your sense of style?
LM: Eye purrfur go win “aw nah chore all” (i.e., nakey) most of de thyme, butt fur pawties on Instagram, Eye likes mi old-skool top hat & red bow tie, & Eye jest gots an old-skool straw boater fur de warmer whether. F Eye wore pants, Eye wood wanna wear suss pend doors. Eye likes to keeps it reel butt all sew keeps it classy, & wut evah type of appurrel whee talkin ah bout, day jest don’t makes it as good as day used to. On a re lay Ted note, Eye luvs give van mi shaw tea tiaras & neck laces on Instagram dat looks like day B long in a meowseum.
KM: What are your thoughts on dogs and other animals?
LF: Dawgs most Lee kneads to B re ha bill ah Tate Ted & taut dat day don’t kneads to dew tricks fur dare treats. Eye purrsonally tink Papa Pug (mi furriend & Secy Lando Solo’s true pear ant) B de balm, & heez taut mee alot of cewl stuff dat Eye Kant reel E disc cuss hear. Other animals? Eye tinks Eye wood likes to makes furriends with sum ducks & other kinds of Byrds.
KM: If you could make one wish, what would it be?
LF: Dat Eye cud have more den one wish to make! Heeheehee… Sear E us Lee, dat a tuff quest shin, Kitty. Eye nose mi IG purrsona wood wish dat Eye cud meets all mi deer IG furriends in “reel life” sew whee cud true Lee takes ovah de werld, butt mi home purrsona wood wish fur mi moms & daddy to B as hap pea, as hell thee, & as in luv with life as Eye yam.
KM: You have a kind heart and a great sense of humour! I also know you have many skills in your repetoire. Tell us a bit about it.
LF: Derpin immeowdiately com to mind: Eye wuz born to derp. It mi purrsonal philosophy dat no mat err how bad or how scare E thangs git, ewe gots to derp on regardless. Derpin may axe shoe Lee help to oh pin blocked chakras. Eye yam all sew a healer hoo all weighs tell mi moms wen shee sic dat shee shud feed mee & den git rite in to bed, wear Eye will sit on her till shee feel bet err. Eye bin developin dis further bi sum thymes B yin a shaman name Hongo. In Hongo mode, Eye kin go in to de derpest of derp spays & commeownicate with de Mothership, de vessel of kat soles, & ah range fur hour deer furriend Oskie to com back to pawty with us on Instagram on spesh shell oak Kay shins. Eye finds dis to B vary healin fur mee as well as fur dose hoo luved Oskie, & it B proof dat luv strong B grr den death. Eye yam all sew a song rye tour, tho sew far Eye have own Lee writ tin 2 songs (de won katz on IG no B mi anthem–it call “Derp It”).
LF: Luv, good food, furriendship, good food, fun, good food, a piece full home, good food, healin, good food, justice, good food, hope, good food, & good food. And Y dat B? Eye tink all D’s thangs B purrty strait fur word, don’t ewe?
KM: You are very active in the political scene. What are your thoughts on cats in politics? Do you think we need fair representation in office?
LF: Eye fells in to pawlitics wen Eye won de November derp-off jest a phew daze B fur Trump wuz E lick Ted purresident in de U.S. Dat wuz wen Eye D sided it mite B fun to create a Derp Cab Net & govern on IG fur a month. Eye thawt it mite cheer up katz & dare Hugh mens. Butt dis thang took off, jest likes mi Derp Spays Ship 1, & hear Eye yam all most 6 months lay tour, still Mr Derpurrez, with a most inspirin Cab Net–witch ink clued ewe, Secy Kitty! And it knot fur laffs Annie moor: Eye gots sum Cab Net meme burrs hoo B seer E us kat act tiff fists, on de front lines of save van katz in knead, & Eye tinks dat have van a pawlitical bass kin git moor ah ten shin foe cussed on de well bee yin of katz. Whee kneads to makes hour voice says herd sew dat hi-kill shell tours go de weigh of de dodo Byrd (oar dial-up inter net), & fur laws to change sew dat Hugh mens hoo tour chore katz B pun noshed most severe Lee. Dares all sew room fur moor den jest one kat leader; Eye jest hap pinned to B de furst one on Instagram, caws Eye saw de oppurrtunity to tri sum thin new & went with it, & Eye founds Eye cud git like minded katz two gether. Sew a resoundin yes on kat repurrsentation in pawlitics! And another thang: Whee Kant save every kat in dis tress, butt whee kin sir tan Lee care fur hour furriends of all species–have dare backs, bellies, & tails (if day gots em). Dat jest as imp port tent: de purrsonal con neck shins whee make with each other.
LF: (Blushing beneath fur coat) Eye gots a spesh shell Jung lady kat name Ruby hoo Eye bin courtin cents last August, wen Eye puts out an APB to finds a date fur de Instagram pet prom & Ruby’s moms let her go with mee. Fur mee, it wuz luv at furst site. Ruby a beauty full, petite mini panther, with ice like two golden son flours, & she sew full of spear it & fun. Dare no language barrier fur us E van tho shee German & Eye rite in old-skool Catonese. Plus, as Ruby show mee on hour vary furst date wen Eye tooks her out fur a spin on de dance floor, shee throw down like ewe wood knot B leave! Ruby under stood mee rite off de bat: Eye yam a vary complex man kat. Butt whee tooks it kinda slow at furst & went on jest a phew dates (neither of us were pawty katz at dat thyme). Eye tooks her to Coney Island a phew weaks aft err de prom & on Halloween, to a dub bill bill of Nosferatu & Dracula’s Daughter. Eye found out dat Eye wuz a romeowntic, & Ruby N courage dat sighed of mee. It wuz mi pleasure to set up her big sistah Snorre with mi best furriend Oskie soon B fur de historical November derp-off, & day fells head ovah tails in luv, two. Wen Eye B cames Mr Derpurrez, Eye axed Ruby to B mi Furst Shaw Tea. F it had ant bin fur her, Eye don’t no F Eyed have had de nerve to throw mi vary furst pawty on IG: de Inauguration Bawl. Ruby all weighs up fur an ad vent chore & shee all weighs make me smile. Shee sew derptastic, Eye wants to gives her every thin her heart D sire. Fur mee, dare cud nevah B Annie won L’s butt Ruby. Dats Y shee mi Furst & Own Lee Shaw Tea.
KM: You are certainly breaking many hearts out there! Ruby is a very lucky girl. How would you describe your dream date?
LF: Annie thin dat Ruby & Eye dew B a dream date to mee, whether it a wiled pawty, a purrivate dinner, travelin to a diff rent thyme in mi Derp Spays Ship 1, oar jest watch chin a moo V & eatin pizza on mi sofa wen whee kin B ah lone.
KM: What would you like to accomplish in the near future?
LF: To keeps spread din de luv, to keeps on evolvin with knew eye dears & purrspectives, & to sum how B able to live up to B yin chosen as one of Instagram’s Kats of de Year. It knot a joke to mee, jest as derpin ain’t a joke E van tho it fun knee, & Eye wants to use mi title knot as street cred oar braggin rites, butt fur de great err gud. Dares sew much healin dat kneads to hap pin, on sew many levels, in sew many play sez, & Eye wants to B part of dat healin bi B yin de best Little Franklin Eye kin pawsibly B.
KM: Do you have anything else you would like to say?
LF: DERP ON REGARDLESS!